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Where do you belong?

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[05 Dec 2005|09:08am]

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what's hiding in your mind?

s [06 Nov 2005|04:14pm]

Hello there. I'm new here. I was just searching through various communities and I happened to pass by this one. To tell you the truth, I'm having my doubts concerning this community. I've given it a thorough scan, and it doesn't appear to be the most lively community.

People stop by, join the community, say hello and they they appear to disappear again. It appears that no is commenting on other people's posts.

Then again, I'm looking through the content of everyone's posts and they're all the same. None the less, I still felt like i had to join this community.
2 lost thoughts| what's hiding in your mind?

just wanted to say hi [15 Oct 2005|09:41pm]

How's everyone here?
2 lost thoughts| what's hiding in your mind?

[24 Aug 2005|10:18pm]
I just wanna make a point abount all those "application" communities. they're too restrictive! for instance: what if youre not really a "music" person and they tell you to name 5 of your favorite bands and 5 of your favorite singers-you dont HAVE 5 favorite bands OR singers but you still could be a good person for that community! but if you say "I'm not really that into music" then they'll freak out and be like "youre NOT INTO MUSIC?!?! well then youre an idiot..blah blah REJECTED" and its the most immature and biased thing I've ever seen!

frankly, its just a bunch of teenagers trying to create their own form of government and we all know thats just not gonn work!

and another thing, why are people sooo cruel on LJ? I think its because they dont have to see the reactions and they dont really get that some people may take them seriously. Its really sad though, I could never say-or type anything so cruel to anyone like they do! arguements on LJ are the dumbest thing ever cause the person your arguing w/ could just take his time in thinking of the best comeback and vice-versa so they can go on forever

sorry I'm being such a crybaby but people just disturb me so much w/ their cruelty, and not just from the internet!
5 lost thoughts| what's hiding in your mind?

[20 Aug 2005|12:25am]
OH GOD THANK GOD i FOUND YOU!!! where do I begin??? I 1st felt different when went to preschool and saw the other kids and I noticed how they were so... cruel, I mean just how they just didnt care. oh but theres so many things diffrent about me that I couldnt get it into one entry!

just tell me this community still exists and who YOU guys are!
1 lost thought| what's hiding in your mind?

[15 Aug 2005|09:16pm]
I know we all get those nights where we toss and turn and can't sleep. Or sit around and worry about the future and a thousand things that have gone wrong in the day, in your life. Sometimes we just need a voice to talk to, someone who won't judge us or condemn us for our thoughts, but open thier hearts to your pain or loneliness or just desire to have another person listening. I remember wanting to be listened to, to not have an earful of criticisms inflicted on. To just speak and have someone tell me they understand. And offer advice when I wanted it, not when all I needed was to vent.

Or perhaps you're having a night that's just too quiet and boring, you want to have a lively conversation with someone. To share some time and jokes, maybe some playful flirting to liven up the night. Give me a call, I'd like to hear from you, be there for you.

1-800-863-5478 ext. 0620567

what's hiding in your mind?

It's quiet in here! [07 Aug 2005|09:58pm]

I just want to say hello.

I was born/raised in Chicago, college educated in Las Vegas (UNLV), and now I'm back in Chicago as a jazz musician (vocalist)/business owner. I grew up an only-child under hard-working entrepreneur parents who were barely home, I never got to really see anyone while I was growing up, and I was always bad at making friends.

My best years were at UNLV and I made a lot of friends, but now that I moved back to Chicago as a working adult, I just find it hard to really meet new friends. My wife is also having a hard time... it's like we're strangers in our own hometown!

Anyway enough about me, I'm just glad to find others like myself here.

1 lost thought| what's hiding in your mind?

[27 May 2005|08:55pm]

I've started a community. I hope it's okay to post this here.


I'd love to hear from all of you...
I'm sorry that I haven't said much about myself....
1 lost thought| what's hiding in your mind?

[27 Apr 2005|07:43pm]

Hello, I'm Lady Daewen. Please feel free to talk to me. I like to listen.
2 lost thoughts| what's hiding in your mind?

[22 Apr 2005|01:01pm]

Hey guys. I'm a 19 year old girl from southern New Hampshire. I hate being corny and predictable by saying "Oh I'm so glad I found this community!" blah blah blah, but I am. (Does that make me a hypocrite?)

Twice that I can remember, I felt like I had found a place to belong. First time was in a Drum and Bugle Corps, lasted three years until I realized that despite all my hard work, I had very little to show for it. All I had was the generic medals they pass out at the end of the season. Pissed off at the staff, I quit. Second time was during my junior and senior years of high school, in the high school band. However, four days before graduation, all but one of the "band seniors" turned their back on me. I have yet to find my "niche" here at college... one of my few friends thinks I will someday... I doubt it.

Along with having a problem with fitting in and not pushing everyone away from me, I have trouble maintaining the balance between holding too tightly and "ignoring" everybody...
1 lost thought| what's hiding in your mind?

wow [20 Mar 2005|06:52pm]


I'm amazed.  A community that doesn't make one post applications or judge?  Thank you. 

As for me...I'm...I don't know.  I can't even describe myself.  On the outside, I suppose I seem like the normal teenage stereotype girl...happy, smiling, lots of friends, great boyfriend, etc...but if any of them could look inside my mind...I'm not like them.  I'm not like anyone that I know of.  I feel like everyday I'm constantly trapped in something that I'm not quite part of, something that I don't really want to be part of.  I hate myself because I can't voice my inner thoughts...I never can.  Which is probably why I spend a large amount of my time sitting at my computer...because I find it easier to type out my thoughts rather than speak them.  Even my LiveJournal doesn't speak completely true to who I am, but I'm on my way. 

3 lost thoughts| what's hiding in your mind?

<3 [10 Mar 2005|05:12pm]

just here to do a little promoting <333

2 lost thoughts| what's hiding in your mind?

[24 Feb 2005|01:56pm]

Hello I am KD. And so it begins...

I have always mentally cast myself as the wanderer. The figure clad in black on the outskirts of everything. Fitting in nowhere. Spending my life looking for someplace I belong and coming up empty. I have a difficult time relating to people expecially in real life situations. I love my solitdue don't get me wrong but its a little saddening to not have people around when you'd like them around. Not being able to make or keep friends. And its not just that. I was the queer kid in the little southern town and well I still am. I feel a little better about things than I used to but I can still feel a lot of things weighing me down.
what's hiding in your mind?

life [28 Jan 2005|08:20pm]

[ mood | indifferent ]

I haven't posted anything, here for a while.  I think for the last week or so I've been trying my best to pretend to fit in.  With a new semester starting it was pretty easy.  Nobod y knew me.  The problem is no matter how much of an act I put on I'm still left with the fact that I don't quite belong.  Sure, I have friends, and they are really great.  There are just certain aspects of myself that if I showed them they wouldn't understand.  I'm not saying it's their fault or anything like that.  Just, I don't know how to explain some things in a way people would understand. 

what's hiding in your mind?

[27 Jan 2005|11:27pm]

As much as I try, I can't seem to relate to 98% of the people I know. So I search for this companionship that is completely unattainable. When I think I've found it, I latch on and ride the waves until I realize I was wrong. Not that I've had any bad friends, I've had some great friendships in fact, and I still sometimes talk to these people but I'm seperate from them, and I know that.
Which I guess is why I'm so comfortable on my own. I'd rather be on my own until that person comes along who fits me perfectly. I don't mean this in a romantic way, although I can't say it wouldn't be nice.

I don't know what seperates me from people, I can't say I'm truly unique. It's amusing when I try to fit in with other people and within 5 seconds I just back away and go "what are you doing, Tara?" heh.

I know at this point it's the fact that people don't seem to have a mind of thier own, but when I was in elementry school and feeling this way? I mean when I was little I had countless imaginary friends and I'd probabaly say I still make things up to this day at 17 years old.
I've lived thousands of things in my head, so much that I've gone through month long periods of isolation without even a blink of an eye. The thing is, the world in your head, although limitless, is the loneliest.

i'm also terrible at explaining myself.
1 lost thought| what's hiding in your mind?

Ideas? ( x-posted) [08 Jan 2005|07:35pm]

Morrigann and I have been discussing taking to the road and, essentially, becoming gypsies. Since A)most of my money making skills require, at the very least, a central office of some sort from which various and sudry tasks are doled out to me and B) being a gypsy is sort of something you have to be born into, I was (and to a degree still am) less than favorable to the idea. Not the travelling caravan thing, just the lone gypsy thing. My minor irrational fear of bridges ( wow, I hadn't noticed...that's like another 10 or 15 hero points...!) makes the idea of my function being primarily the driver seem a little silly. I really don't want to get into that right now...it involves a story about the ghost of a man trapped in concrete on the bridge he helped erect...really, its just uncool. Moving on...

I have been giving the idea some consideration, however. I have this fascination with things that are outside the norm as well as an attraction for, let's say, vintage professions. The idea of a small travelling carnival or even a pseudo gypsy camp really appeals to me! So I've been going over some of the logistics of it for the past hour or two -- pricing vehicles and trailers, researching supplies needed for extended "vacations", that sort of thing -- and I think that with a good enough plan and a few investors, we could pull it off. Don't worry...I have no intentions of hitting any of you up for cash. I hate owing anyone anything. Which, now that I think about it, blows some huge holes into the investor idea. I'll get over it.

Really, what I'm curious to know from anyone who's reading this is what would you want to see? So far our/my idea is still based on the "gypsy" idea: fortune tellers, dancers, fire spinners, that sort of thing. I can see doing a small midway deal as well, maybe just a couple booths of wares and food. We'd primarily be touring ren faires (although I personally would like to end the tour at Burning Man ). What do you think? Questions, suggestions and criticisms are all welcome.
3 lost thoughts| what's hiding in your mind?

[06 Jan 2005|11:50pm]

Is it just me but from reading peoples entries and from receiving comments it seems that there are alot of people in this community that do HAVE FRIENDS and are suicidal. I thought this was about being different from others, being a loner, and not connecting to people because we just feel like we aren't like them. So far everyone just seems like Hi i'm really depressed and want to kill myself, or I have friends but just not where i live. I guess i can't relate to the people here either since i don't have any friends nor do i need them and i don't want to kill myself or hate myself.

I love my life and i love where my life is going. Yes i've had a rough past but i built a bridge and got over it. What I'm trying to get at is if there is anyone in this community that loves being a loner, doesn't want friends or have friends, loves their life, and loves themselves?

Sorry if this post makes people angry but it's just what i noticed and what i wanted to know.
11 lost thoughts| what's hiding in your mind?

Intro. [04 Jan 2005|07:29am]
Hey, I'm new!
I'm female 19 from England. Found this community by chance. Nothing in my life seems to work out right. No Job, no friends and no directions. I have this dream that i cling on to, it doesn't make much sense, it's just a list that i'd like to share:
No carpets, Dimmed lights, gramophone, Daisies, Purple curtains, Overgrown garden, Only eating oranges, Red dress, The surgeons knife, The butchers wife..."I want you to want me that much".

so, hello!
1 lost thought| what's hiding in your mind?

what have did I do last year [01 Jan 2005|10:48pm]

[ mood | pensive ]

I was thinking back on the last year and wondering what, if anything did I do. 

  • I started college   (January)
  • I got my GED  (May)
  • I got my licence  (June)
  • I got a car, nothing fancy but i luv it  (July)
  • I took a ballroom dancing class  (September)
  • I got a 3.70 gpa  (December)

1 year ago I dropped out of high school

 3 years ago I tried to kill myself

So maybe I have done a lot of stuff

2 lost thoughts| what's hiding in your mind?

hey [28 Dec 2004|11:26pm]

i just discovered this community and it's nice to know that others are in a near close position as i am.

i don't have friends, i have people who i talk to in school if they are in my classes and if non of their friends are around. Those people are not friends and i actually hate more than half of them. I've been a loner practically all my life except for the few rare years that for whatever reason i had alot of friends, people who admired me and wanted to be me. I never considered myself a loner untill the one person who i considered my bestest friend from now untill forever had a psychotic episode was put on pills and achieved a different personality that did not connect with me. I haven't talk to her in months and she has never bothered to call me in the year after her episode. I have a boyfriend who will one day be my husband and he is like me in every way but also far different then I am. I don't crave to have a million friends or want everyone to love and adore me, I just wish i had that one best friend again who i could call and hang out with.

It's hard when youre really sad, happy, bored, or whatever and you look in your phone book and you have no numbers.

I don't know where i fit in with the people in my school. I look at myself and i'm as normal as can be but when i talk to people they seem so foreign and so weird. I find myself to be very normal very very very normal even my look is normal and everyone is so strange but yet they have so many friends.

I love being a loner and not depending on other people all the time. There isn't any major drama in my life like everyone elses who has all these people close to them. I don't have to revolve myself around everyone or have a cell phone plan to pay for. The town I live in is just really closely hooked in the groups they have been in since 3rd grade.

For whatever reason i've been told very often that i seem very self absorbed. I'm an art kid what do you expect...but i'm the only art kid that i know which is a loner and doesn't have this close group of friends.
12 lost thoughts| what's hiding in your mind?

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